Seriously? Is It Just Me…

Seriously. A man should kill the maggots!

Posted on: November 28, 2008

After having lived alone for so many years, I have become quite comfortable being on my own. I eat what I want to; if and when I want to. I leave clothes in the floor and pick them up when I’m ready. And I watch whatever I want on the best TV in the house. But the other night, I had an incident where I realized I actually need a man in the house.

Now, I am a clean person – everythin g has it’s place including dirt – which is outside. But somehow, a stray baking potato got shoved behind my dish cloths unbeknownest to me, and apparently to my maids (which I need to find out how that happened). As I was preparing to start cooking my Thanksgiving dishes I unearthed the long lost potato which had turned into a disgusting black mushy liquid. Slightly annoyed that it has gone hidden for so long, I proceeded to move the nastiness into the trash using an old catalog. But then, I found myself starting to vomit as I discovered a nest of maggots lay underneath the potato mush. Still gagging, I quickly grabbed my Raid Ant Spray and doused the squirming worms until they were clearly dead.

Everyone, I tried, I swear I tried to be a big girl and clean up the vermin mess. I tried, but I had no gloves, a bad gag reflex and fear of insects (dead or alive) to overcome which is asking a lot of a girl like me (see about us). Thankfully, my father was on his way into town and was willing to come over to help me, or rather be supervised by me, to clean up the maggots. As I sat on my couch waiting on my Dad and rocking myself into a state of calmness, I realized that this is when living alone sucks. If I had a man, he could have killed the maggots. Seriously!

4 Responses to "Seriously. A man should kill the maggots!"

Seriously…I never know that I am actually missing a man until something goes awry at the house….last time it was the lighbulb in the linen closet went out – took me over a week to fix it. If I had a man, it would have been done in minutes. Oh well, at least you had your dad.

Seriouly you two are delsuional. Having a man does not guarantee you will have all the problems at your house fixed immediately. It only guarantee that there will some to yell at when it doesn’t get done on your time table. Trust me I have a husband and a whole in my dining room ceiling. And they have both been there for months.

Seriously… You need a webcam in your house too. Just thinking of you having to deal with maggots makes me shiver (in sympathy) giggle (because we all know my slightly sadistic side). I am siding with Sister on this one though, just because there is a man in the house does not mean that emergencies like this one will be taken care of properly. Remember my vulture experience in the back yard???

I say start a business called “Rent a Husband”, cause you get what you pay for.

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Soapbox Diaries from an Unplanned Single Life!

I hope you enjoy the random thoughts, observations and life lessons that I've learned along the way. It's called Seriously? because some days I just shake my head and say seriously, is this my life?


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