Seriously? Is It Just Me…

Archive for the ‘Crushes’ Category

My best girlfriend and I just got back from the incredibly scenic city of Vancouver, British Columbia. The views there were simply postcard perfect. The entire week we were surrounded by majestic snowcapped mountains, a multitude of evergreen trees sprinkled throughout the city, the calm sun-kissed harbor waters sparkling in the sunlight and oh, hot Australian men who had made Canada their home away from home. After a week of flirting and swooning after every male Aussie we met, I was convinced that I needed to date me an Australian and here’s why:

1. Apparently, most Aussie’s travel to Vancouver on their holidays from University (see, I sound like one already) and they fall in love with the beauty of Canada. This passion and love of being a part of nature and a culture of giving back was quite attractive.

2. Since they spent most of their time outside, they were sporting their bronzed skin along with dark hair and eyes, and frankly that just makes my heart pound.

3. Of course, riding dirt bikes, hiking and giving zipline tours all day represents a much more carefree lifestyle that makes a corporate working girl like myself ponder how much greener that grass is on the other side. I’m sure if I had an Aussie he could teach me a thing or two about living without walls.

4. Which reminds me, I’ve always wanted to go to Australia and have placed it strategically on my bucket list. Hanging out with an native would be my way of vicariously visiting his country and hopefully a faster chance to see it in person.

5. But let’s face it, none of the above even matters once he starts talking. Honestly, he could be overweight, balding and jobless as long as he says mate somewhere in his sentence, I’m ready to jump his bones.

Unfortunately, none of the above are really good reasons to settle in with an Australian especially after a Canadian warned me to watch out for them because they will break your heart. Great, these blokes sound just like my type, seriously?

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I’m not a big fan of flying…I’m pretty certain it’s a control issue. So when I find myself sitting in an airport waiting for my flight to board, I tend to get anxious and uncomfortable. While I may not be a fan of flying, I am a fan of people watching or more like hot pilot scouting. Granted, they are few and far between but every once and a while I hit the jackpot. And when I do, I think damn I should date a pilot and here’s why:

1. Who doesn’t love a man in a uniform? It must be a woman thing, but there is just something about a good looking man in an uniform and this includes those guys who fly our friendly skies. Add his hat and sunglasses to the ensemble, and it’s enough to make you swoon.

2. You get to travel on the cheap. With an employee of the airlines, the family and friends discount makes your travel expenses seem insignificant. Australia, here I come.

3. Tips for joining the mile high club. While I’m still not sure what the point of trying to do it in an airplane bathroom is, especially when there’s not even enough room in there for me to do my business, but regardless it’s still something to brag about once you figure it out.

4. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. Sure, there’s the potential to lose your man while he’s off flying around the country. Thankfully, the hiring requirement for stewardesses is no longer young, attractive blonds. I’ll take my chances with the gay males and older ladies in their sensible shoes.

5. Bravery looks good on a man. Let’s face it, our friendly skies aren’t so friendly these days with crazy terrorists determined to kill us in the name of Allah. And let’s not even talk about flocks of birds, texting air traffic controllers, and spontaneous electrical storms that threaten to bring down a 400 ton mechanical bird. Getting a few hundred impatient people from one city to another safely takes some guts in my opinion.

Now, I just have to find me a pilot that’s single, attractive and willing to share his discount. I’m guessing I’ll need to lay off the Xanax next time I’m flying so I can at least be coherent enough to work my magic, seriously?

Throughout my life I’ve generally been more successful at having female friends rather than male ones. It frustrates me somewhat because I think having a guy friend to pal around with can be a lot of fun. They are able to offer a different perspective on dating, they can be great wingmen (if used properly), and who couldn’t use a dose of testosterone to help with the heavy lifting around the house. However, finding a true male friend tends to be the exception rather than the rule.

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  • In: Crushes
  • Comments Off on Seriously, I should date Eric Bana.

Two of the last few movies I’ve seen had Eric Bana in them and both times I found myself losing focus on the story line and wondering what if? So if I could date Eric Bana, here are my top reasons why:

  1. He’s hot…especially when he is clean shaven with that short hair cut.
  2. He has an accent, mate. No surprise here that I’m one of the millions of American women who falls for an Australian accent every time.
  3. Body Approved. Thanks to the character Henry in The Time Traveler’s Wife, who can only travel naked, I’ve been given a sneak peek at some of his goodies…and I approve.
  4. We would laugh and laugh….and laugh. Since he started out as a comedian, he’s got a great sense of humor and that’s the way into my heart.
  5. He’s hot…especially when he has some facial growth and that shaggy hair cut.

I know he’s married so I’m wondering if his wife would agree with my list or if she would just show me hers of things about him that bug the hell out of her. They say the grass is always greener on the other side, seriously.

Remember your early love years? Those innocent days when you would find yourself completely enamored with some young boy in your school or church. Everything about him was cool; the way his hair was styled, the clothes he wore, even the way he said hello. He was truly perfect in your eyes. You would find yourself doodling his name inside hearts all over your notebook, or scribbling away in your pink diary about how much you loved him and wondering if he noticed you in the cafeteria line. When he walked in the room or looked your way, you would giggle uncontrollable for hours with your girlfriends. “Oh my God, he looked at me!” and you would squeal with delight. If Lady Luck was on your side and he spoke to you, it made your whole week and no one could pull you off cloud nine. There is truly something to be said about having a crush.

As we get older and find ourselves trying to be in a relationship, we lose the magic of the crush. I’m not talking about celebrity crushes, because really those are more fantasies than a true crush. I’m talking about a guy who makes your day without even knowing it. I think what makes a crush so great, is the possibilities. The what could be instead of the what will be. The desire to be chased but not being caught. The butterflies that will only die on your terms. After years of loving, losing and searching, a crush can turn from harmless fun into an over analyzed potential relationship that you hope to turn into marriage, kids and “happily ever after”. If you find yourself having a little crush, keep it simple. Doodle his name in your journal, giggle quietly when he walks in the room, and hang out on cloud nine for awhile, then pray it doesn’t turn into a relationship. Seriously.

For all you Twilight fans out there you’ll completely understand why I think it’s a good idea to date a vampire. Here are my top reasons why:

  1. He’s gorgeous. Yes, Edward is cuter than Robert Pattinson, no offense Bob!
  2. Although he’s 17 in human years, he’s technically 107 which is well over the legal age limit. Sweet!
  3. He sparkles like a diamond in the sunlight and we all know how much I love my bling.
  4. Since he can read minds, I won’t have to tell him what I want or how I like it..know what I mean. “wink wink”
  5. He’s a good vampire, so I don’t have to worry about him sucking the blood out of my friends and family. I hate it when your loved ones don’t get along with your new boyfriend.

This is really a great book/movie and the characters are wonderful, but this kind of “prince charming” is gonna screw with a lot of young girls heads, seriously!

 

Boba Fett/Read His Story

Boba Fett - Read His Story

Okay, the correct spelling is Boba Fett but I like my version better. For those of you who aren’t Star Wars fans (like me obviously), he’s the bounty hunter from the first set of SW movies. 

Kim and I met him last month at our annual local Halloween pub crawl where he won an award for his extremely accurate costume. Well, he certainly left a big impression on us and we can’t stop talking about him. It was probably because he was comfortable being the only straight guy out of his group of gay friends. Or maybe it was that he was more interested in us than the Rainbow Bright peek-a-boo panty show right in front of us. But more than likely it was because underneath the mask he looked like Wentworth Miller from the show Prison Break. Yummy! Regardless of why, we are now on our own hunt for our hot bounty hunter Boba Fett. Any leads would be appreciated. Now, what we do with him once we find him is another story. 

Maybe I’ll give him a lock of my braided hair for his collection. Seriously.


Soapbox Diaries from an Unplanned Single Life!

I hope you enjoy the random thoughts, observations and life lessons that I've learned along the way. It's called Seriously? because some days I just shake my head and say seriously, is this my life?


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